In an age where the trend in parenting has undergone a major paradigm shift, due to increased exposure and awareness, the need to understand the art of balancing or withholding ourselves from becoming that “excessively-obsessed-about-everything-in-my-child’s-life”, is thrusting a bigger challenge on us than mere parenting!
Our higher disposable incomes, coupled with our increased awareness and not to mention, that self-obsession of being that “perfect parent”, everything is driving our kids’ growth trajectory to a different level.
Kids today are a far cry from previous generations of children. Being born in the tech savvy age, they are more adept at certain technical skills, than we were! In fact, I feel, that the kids also shuttle from being that “know-it-all and done-it-all’ arrogant selves to the much more tyrant forms of teenage kids at times. Suddenly innocence is lost and all we are left with a generation of kids propagating “arrogance is the new cool”.
And as a parent, I will not blame this generation alone because I know somewhere down the lane we also are equally to be blamed. But then again, do we know what is going in wrong in process? Do we realize what mistakes we are committing while raising kids? I guess not, nor do I! No wonder, I’m a work-in-progress mom, where progress at an individual level sometimes becomes a far-fetched dream! Yet, I’m on the lookout to observe, consciously and deliberately re-route my brain and parenting strategy to inch slowly, yet progressively.
As a parent, I have usually seen two kinds of parents around me. One, who believe in restraining from everything as they fear the child might become spoilt to uber-indulgent parents, who believe in fetching everything that the child sees or hears! These visions of extreme parenting styles are what calls for a more balanced approach in parenting. Some sort that would help them understand where to pull the string without harming the child’s needs, while at the same time, keeping your mental peace intact!
And that is when “Authoritative Parenting” comes into picture!
My last blog talked about the Art and Science behind firm parenting and in turn, throwing light on the need to adopt more adaptable and balanced form of parenting, the “Authoritative Parenting”. The following few pointers are what summarize the pros of the parenting style!
- Considered as the most effective way of rearing children, Authoritative parents, neither are too lenient nor are they do strict, while raising kids. They understand where to draw the line and demonstrate their affections, while being firm!
- They chart out clear rules of children’s behavior that are fair and flexible. The best part is they remain consistent with it as well. The flexibility arises depending upon the severity of a situation.
- An authoritative parent is always a good listener, who listens to a child’s point of view, before passing on that clear instruction. This act encourages and motivates a child to be responsible, by allowing him to take his decisions. Such parents are never pushy or imposing! In short, they encourage kids to be independent.
- Authoritative parents spend a lot of quality time with kids, developing a friendly relationship of warmth, respect and love. The former gives a sense of security, which helps as the kids’ listen and reciprocate in the situations when the parents are a tad bit firm.
- Authoritative parents are not too rigid and understand the need to change with the growth of a child. This helps the children to grow into responsible and trustworthy individuals!
- Due to love and respect, shown by authoritative parents, the chances of disagreement and conflict in the future also becomes minimum as the kids grow up to be more like friends.
The idea behind such a parenting style is to help children make use of reasoning and work independently. However, if in process the child breaks rules, then such parents deal the situations to bring about discipline with fairness and firmness. Consistency is the key. The idea is to keep certain ground rules fixed so that the child knows that no matter what certain rules need to be abided (like no hitting, no biting, etc.)
Authoritative parents often are said to raise happier individuals, who have better emotional control and regulations, good social skills and are self-confident because of their inclination to learn new skills and independence.
With such profound benefits in a child’s personality, I’m sure it’s what will keep many a parents read and try to practice the style. It’s definitely worth a try! What say the parents?